I'm on a bumpy ride.

Loads of stuff has happened in the past few weeks. Seriously, loads.

School is really taking it's toll on me, and I'm not sure how much more I can take. I have so many feelings inside that need to be talked out- and my Dad isn't here and he's the one who I usually tell everything to, so that's a bit annoying. Decisions about my future, memorising and friendships are all hanging in the balance of my life right now. And honestly, my little brain, heart and mind are all confused.

Boys. Pfft, forget about it. I don't have any chuffing time for myself anymore, let alone boys! That's a big change I've noticed- I couldn't care less about my appearance for school anymore. Sure, I still make the effort. But inside I'm like 'Danielle you could do the same with no make up on.' A crazy thought, me turning up to school with no make up on. But being in Year 10 has taught me that school doesn't equal socialising- it equals work. Work, revision, hand cramps- basically my life now. I cannot WAIT for the summer holidays where I will be able to sit back and relax on holiday. Being in school is doing my head in at the moment. I'm trying to not let it affect me, but people are also getting on my nerves too. Basically, all I want is to go to school, do the work and come home. But certain people are making this difficult by bitching and whispering. My little 'group' has divided and it's stupid. We all have our opinions and I am shocked by some of them. Obviously I can't express all my feelings on here. Which is another thing, I might start a private blog, or another form of 'therapy' because copycats are lurking and it's just blagging my head.

Decisions about my future are actually becoming a little easier for me...but it's just what I do with myself from now until then. urgh, there's so much I want to say on here but I can't. I never used to get restricted, and now I do.

I just want things to be simple. But hey, life isn't simple is it. I guess I'm just going to have to learn from these experiences. I'm in a really strange way at the moment and it's nice to see who cares and who doesn't. At least I know now.

Random Questions-bordum kicked in!

Full Name?

Danielle Jade Brear

Age?

15

Birthday?

20th December 1995

Eye Colour?

Mixture of blue, green and grey. It depends on the light and what I'm wearing :)

Hair colour?

Blonde highlights throughout the top of my head with my natural, more browny colour underneath. Like ombre hair but backwards..ish :P

Body type?

I'd say i'm correctly proportioned, petite & slim

Three personality traits?

I smile and laugh a lot & I'm generally very talkative :D

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I wouldn't allow negative thoughts to enter my brain

What job would you love to have?

I'd be a celebrity interviewer, as well as doing bits and bobs for magazines such as more! Also, I'd be best buddies with the likes of One Direction and Simon Cowell..that'd be awesome ;)

Favourite day of the week?

Friday, but not for the lessons. just for the fact that it's Friday! Saturday is a close second though :)

Favourite restaurant?

Nandos!!

What is your biggest regret?

I never regret anything I do, because at the time, it was what I wanted.

Describe 'your type.'

Honestly, I haven't got a type for 'looks' like: you must have brown hair and freckles. As long as you have a kind heart, great sense of humour and aren't afraid to be a little romantic, that's all it takes to please me :)

10 Most attractive men?

Harry Styles

Orlando Bloom

Sam Worthington

Josh Franceschi

Matt Lanter

Robert Pattinson

Jesse Metcalf

Chris Brown

Liam Payne

Lewis Hamilton

(see..a rang of guys there!)

Where would you love to visit?

South Africa- i wanna stand on the top of Table Mountain

The Grand Canyon

Miami

California

Boston

New York

Italy-i really wanna taste the pasta and see if it's actually nicer over there

To be honest, I'd be honoured if I got to go visit anywhere I'd never been before. I'd love to see the whole world :)

Favourite Song?

Free Fallin' by John Mayer

Favourite type of music?

Rock, indie, pop, rnb. I can listen to basically anything. If it's got a good beat, lemme listen!

Favourite band?

gotta be The Beatles

What rock group would you most like to hang out with?

AC/DC!

Do you cry at movies?

depends on the movie. If it's Marley & Me- bring me some tissues!

Just something fun to do :P Hey..hows about YOU DO IT!? :D x

I'M BACK BITCHESSS...

Good evening guys!

Well, usually, I have a topic to kind of work on for my blogging. However, tonight I am a bit stuck because I haven't blogged in agessss! but it feels so good! :L

So, I've had a really rough day today :/ I had an English exam, and I'm ace at English but the exam didn't go too well in my opinion, I hope I'm wrong :/
Also, we had a college day and I can honestly say I am so so so stuck as to what I want to do/be when I grow up. I'm scared. And I'm also scared that when I finally realise, it'll be too late. Ideally, I would love to work in the Music/Magazine industry. Either will be a brilliant experience. I also would love to travel the world and see the sites...perhaps find myself.

I've had a pretty tough time recently, actually. Now I think about it.

On a Monday, I think it was June the 1st, but it was definitely Monday- I took a turn for the worst. Basically, I went to get a drink of water after losing a lot of blood. My ears started ringing so loudly that I couldn't hear anything, and a split second later I felt ever so faint that I had to sit myself down. Then, my vision was blurred by an array of colours such as green and yellow and a few red spots. Then, I became clammy and extremely hot, and I had to have my father stand behind me and rub my shoulder, as well as allow me to rest my head on his stomach while I tried to recover. I felt like I was on my own and that a false demon had attacked my brain. I thought it was shutting down. It has happened twice before, but only for a short amount of time. This was 10 minutes long, and afterwards I was sick. It was the scariest experience of my life and I wouldn't wish is on anybody.

I also had a mental break down a couple of weeks ago from stress from exams. I just broke down and cried.

Wow...this is depressing isn't it! But here, I can really get my emotions out. I love my blog :)

Anyway, ciao for now and I'll be back soon :) x

long time no blog!!

HOLA BITCHEZZZZ!!
Soooo then, I'm blogging from my phone(never knew I could do this) and tbh it doesn't
Have the same effect but I'm sure you'll be able to bare with me! So omg! My internet is down and it sucks :(
Right nowas I type this there's some guy fixing it? I think..I'm in my room and I'm so hungry and thirsty!!
I'm gunna have to stay in here -.- boooo! I want ma cereal!

So yeah, I've been so ffffing bored. No laptop + internet = no big facebook, big twitter,
Good blogger, no youtube, no itunes! Its been pure bullshit :(

But what can you expect from me when I return? I've been shopping a lot recently for my holiday(8 weeks dolls!!) ;) and
I'm gonna take some pictures of what I've bought and shizzle :)

Oh my god I'm so hungry and thirsty. God knows how long I'm gunna have to stay in here!

Anyway, ttyl <3